Rethinking Discipline.

People often associate discipline with problems and lacking fun. I on the other hand, believe that discipline can be applied to everything, including the lighthearted parts of life. Let’s debunk the stiff stigma attached to discipline that gives it the same emotional effect of being in trouble as a kid. With that perspective comes uneccessary stress hormones that ruin the results of your discipline.

If you approach discipline with the goal being ease or some other value that is deeply personal to you, you’ll be able to knock the judgement out of the experience and harvest all of the yummy benefits.

Discipline can look like your current morning routine, simply done with commitment and vigor. 

So if you sleep in, do it with conviction for the reasons you choose to. If you scroll through media to entertain yourself before starting another challenging day. Do it with your chest. 

Contrary to what you may have been taught, everything isn’t bad. Some things are just neutral until we prescribe it. Growing up, you may have heard more about what could go wrong than what could go right. This programmed you to always be looking for the bad in a scenario, and how it is negatively impacting you. But what about what’s good about a quick morning fill me up of some of your favorite most delightful content. After all, in the virtual world we live in now, social connection can feel very limited.

Let’s face it. The world has changed, we got an early investors look at how ugly it can get. But by now, we’re wise enough to put a cap on what limits us and create strategy to navigate any tool in a way that benefits us. If you’re just not a social media person, then this conversation is not for you. This is for the people who know they have a mission online; whether that’s to connect healthily, communicate a message, learn or grow an idea. And as such, those negative sentiments around social media can affect how we view our work here.

This perception will dramatically change your energy levels and how you view yourself throughout the day. I spend a lot of time on this subject, because it is a prevalent battle in society’s shift to embracing a world ran by technology. Because of it’s negative impact on some, we’ve inherited the general mindset rather than formulating a purview of our own.

Discipline is also mental discipline. The mental discipline it takes to not beat yourself down for a routine you find purpose in. Do it with your whole heart. And then do everything after that with your whole heart too. 

No one is getting it perfect all of the time. We all want ease in our lives in some way. But that constant self judgement is keeping you from even enjoying the moment while you’re in it. Find your ease and don’t judge yourself for it. 

Things I have to remind myself of. 

I’m not a morning scroller. I have a strict morning routine I follow. I love my life that way. It yields the results I desire. But just now, I paused to watch a reel my sister sent on Facebook. And that led to me watching two more longer videos. I was so entertained, informed and tickled by these videos. That isn’t a terrible way to start my day. 

We often see coaching as teaching you all of the things that are making your life suck. But I skip past those posts. Because depending on who is reading,  they can have a counterproductive effect. I’ve said it about God, and I’ll say it here. Wherever there is a ‘no,’ there is also a YES. What could you be doing instead? How might that benefit you? 

In the case of morning scrolling, maybe you don’t stop because it’s a meaningful part of your day. No one is going on social these days to see what their frenemy wore over the weekend. We’re going on for a reprise, a break, an escape. We’re seeking entertainment, relief, things that make us smile, things that make us think (and sometimes what makes us think is the latest celebrity drama because those things are complex and meant to be studied 😅). Some of us don’t even look at the comments section anymore because we understand what goes on there. 

We practice discipline even with the things typically associated with lacking it. Remove the stigma and make it your own.

If you’re looking to have a more meaningful experience on the internet try these: 

-Pray for the people that upset you or have upsetting perspectives 

-Leave something positive for others to see (build up that good karma)

-Scroll past anything that takes you out of ease 

Dis-ease is something I work daily to rid my life of. So if changing my mind about my morning habits and being more intentional with allowing leisure will bring more ease without disrupting it in other places, I’m going all in. 

If you have an addictive personality like I do, you may feel tempted to go back, after you’ve reached your limit. And yes, you should have a stopping point in mind. I usually go with 3’s. Three videos max and I’m out. Or giving yourself a time boundary, ‘At such and such time, or in such and such minutes, I will log off.’ I’ll get off if the 2nd or 3rd video or after one of those 3 minutes if the content doesn’t grip my attention or feel like something in alignment with my goals at that moment (laughter and ease). I don’t just stay because I get 3. That’s time I could use doing something else that brings ease, like a stretch, a coffee, a personal phone call. The key is to line it up with a goal or value you hold presently. For me, ease and laughter are a priority, so if it’s providing me that within limits and not stealing it from other parts of my day, then it’s a win, and I’m all in (for that duration of time).

If you’re robotic about it, easily sucked in and can’t manage it within limits like these, then there is likely a deeper issue. And you can be pulled out of that. If you have trouble carving time for silence in the morning, it could be a boundary issue. Your plate is toppling, and you haven’t implemented the necessary boundaries for expand to your current level. Or there also be a chemical issue and medication could be required. See a psychiatrist if you think this may be your challenge. 

You can be pulled out of anything, with the right tools and knowledge.

I am firm believer that no matter where you are starting from, the healthiest thing you give yourself each morning is a moment of complete silence before starting your day. And write down or simply notice what comes up. Everything else is icing. 

I’m not one of those coaches that prescribes a lifestyle that “works” but rather, I think we all have a unique makeup and journey, and one man’s version of it, may not work best for another. We all need a tweak here or there to get it to align with our nature. It’s when you understand your nature, and the reason behind your habits that you’re able to strategically cultivate a life you love and don’t have to endure. When you’ve tweaked it to your nature, you probably won’t have the same habits you judge yourself so harshly on. Or you’ll simply be able to see them differently, in a way that pulls you forward not weighs you back. And that is where the growth and magic happens.

I hope this helps you rethink your mornings or your routines in general.

If you have tips on how you manage your discipline, routines or morning mindset, drop them below!

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